Talking to Your Baby from Day One

Posted on April 9, 2013August 12, 2015 by speechies

Although it seems that in the first few weeks and months of your baby’s life, he is only sleeping, eating, crying or hiccuping, the research tells us otherwise.

Babies are listening to the sounds in their environment from the very beginning. In fact, research shows that newborns process their mother's voice differently and more actively than that of strangers.

Talking with your baby from the first day of life gives them a valuable start towards language development.

"The only thing we know of, that makes babies smarter, is talking to them," says Lise Eliot, neuroscientist and author of What's Going on in There?

So, use every opportunity to talk with your baby. Create a moment of communication and connection at every possible moment. Daily routines, such as changing times, feeding, bath time, or going out, are all excellent chances to prepare your baby for a transition through words. For example, “Mama’s going to feed you now,” “Mama’s going to take off your clothes, then we’re gonna take a bath.”

From providing a language rich environment from the start, babies begin to understand what speech sounds like. Soon, they will learn that these sounds become words and have meaning.

To maximize word learning and communication in those first few months of life, use close face-to-face contact during awake times and during conversation. Respond to your baby’s “ooohs” and “uuhhs,” so that he knows he is being heard.

I spoke with Jennifer Laurent, life coach, mom, and author of Excerpts from the Heart of a Mom, to discuss just how capable babies are of communicating, even before they have words to express it.

Jenn Says:

"Our awareness of the ability to communicate with our children allows us to create a deeper parent/child relationship from early on. As new mothers, we can sometimes feel overwhelmed, making it very easy to overlook the innate wisdom our little babies have. By finding ways to slow down and truly validate to our babies that we know they can understand us and we respect their needs as unique beings, we immediately cultivate a relationship based in trust, respect, and unconditional love.

"When we slow things down and quiet the stresses and worries, we are then able to see with our hearts through our eyes. We can take a moment to stop when are babies are crying and really listen, feeling them at a deeper level and calling forth our own innate wisdom and inner voice. We can hear the slight difference in a cry, tune into the look in our babies eyes, and notice the way they take in our love.

"Suddenly we are communicating and it is as if we have a language of our own, a language easily understood by both mother and child.

"This connection is possible and it is profound. Take the time to quiet your mind in whatever way works for you, allowing you to connect with your inner voice.

"Speak to your child and listen to what they have to offer back. Listen with your heart and your entire being. Hold them not only with your arms, but with every inch of love within you. Take time to look into their eyes, seeking to connect with them at the deepest level possible. Open your heart to the gift of communication available to you from the beginning."

Jennifer Laurent wears many hats as a single mother, life coach, author, and yoga instructor. Born and raised in NY, Jennifer earned a BA in Psychology and a Masters in Clinical Social Work. In her first book, Excerpts from the Heart of a Mom, Jennifer presents readers with fundamental insights on her approach to conscious parenting. LiveThroughTheHeart.com is Jennifer’s website where she blogs about life experiences and shares her life coaching skills with readers as a source of inspiration.

6 Opportunities for Conversation with your Teen/Tween

Posted on April 2, 2013August 11, 2015 by speechies

This blog was completed in collaboration with Jeff Stephans, a member of an elite squad… proud dads with daughters. You can check out his anecdotes at CrazyDadLife.com

Remember the good ol’ days when families would get home from work and school, a warm home cooked dinner would be prepared, then everyone would sit down and have a nice meal together as a family? Well, if you are a parent of children under 18, chances are that nowadays those experiences are sporadic at best.

Let’s face it, sitting down at the table with the family every night for dinner is a lost art. Put it up there with pulling out your checkbook register at the grocery store and balancing your checkbook right there as everyone queues up (although this still surprisingly happens and usually in your line).

dad and teen — Create more moments like these

While you may not be able to coordinate a specific and consistent time for everyone to be together at once, communication is still incredibly important to understand what’s going on in your kids’ lives.

Here are 6 opportunities for engaging your kids in conversation and making the most of the times you do spend together.

1. Morning Prep - Yes, mornings are usually hectic. But, as you are fixing lunches and gathering stuff for their backpack, talk to your child about the day to come. With teens this may be difficult as they are borderline zombies in the morning, but try to get them to open up anyway. What’s coming up in school? How do you feel about the Spanish test? What’s the after school plan? Avoid the yes/no questions (e.g. Did you study for your Spanish test?), because chances are you’ll just get a one-word response. Ask open ended questions, and don’t forget to share about your day too. Conversation is mutual. It also helps your kid start to understand that mornings are meant to get your day organized and to prepare yourself for all that you have planned for the day.

2. After School - The school day is over and your child jumps in the car or meets you at home. First question from the parent is usually, “How was school?” to which the usual response is “good.” Apparently that response sums up EVERYTHING. Try a different approach next time. What’s the best thing that happened today? What’s the worst? This will open doors to not only talk about their academics, but their personal experiences too. Listen, and don’t forget to offer your best/worst happenings in exchange.

3. The Chauffeur - You probably have the pleasure of driving your kid around to various sports, after school activities, or social events. Take car time to talk about external events, like pop culture, current events, politics, sports, and entertainment. Ask their opinions and offer your own. Play devil’s advocate and gauge their interest or ability to see the other side of the argument. Fostering these critical thinking skills with complex language and new vocabulary will make them a stronger thinker, while staying connecting to the world around them.

4. Texting - People may raise their eyebrows when mentioning texting as a method to communicate with their kids, but this is the 21st century and let’s face it, kids are constantly head down in their phones. It may be short conversations, but it means a lot to the kids that their parents are ‘plugged in.’ Keep your conversations with your children on a private level, and make sure you ask open-ended questions. If their response is still short, and you’re craving some elaboration, a simple “...” or “???” might do the trick.

5. Night Time Wind Down - The family finally gets to spend some time at home as activities come to an end. Dinner is thrown together and eaten quickly wherever people may be located, doing homework or other nightly tasks. Continue to keep your kids involved in communication. Ask questions and see if they want to “work” together. Create a quiet environment, and as you’re catching up on emails, your child can sit across the table working on an English paper. Chances are if you’re sitting there, they may ask you for a little help, opening more doors to communication.

6. Bedtime - The long day is finally over. Take the time to talk to your kids as you tuck them into bed. Communication at this point is softer and more personal. No need to discuss planning, school, and the general insanity of tomorrow. Spend the time to listen to your child and hear what they have to say. These times are often the most important and reinforce the fact you are always there for them, proud of them, and don’t forget to tell them you love them.

Just remember to have fun, enjoy the exchanges with your children, and make their opinion feel welcomed and valued. Open communication and using these 6 opportunities for conversation will encourage them to get talking, not just at the dinner table.

Jeff Stephens is a proud dad blogger from the Washington DC area. His website, CrazyDadLife.com, is dedicated to all those parents that are experiencing the craziness of raising kids in today’s non-stop world. His insight, advice, and stories from the front lines provide a humorous and (sometimes) informational slant on navigating daily family chaos.

Must Haves on your Spring Bookshelf

Posted on March 19, 2013 by speechies

Now that you’re the expert on Taking Book Reading to the Next Level, its time to continue to build a library of language rich books for your child.

Here are The Speechies picks for your bookshelf this Spring.

Birth to 2 years

Duck & Goose, Here Comes the Easter Bunny!- The illustrations are simple and great for identifying same/different between duck and goose (e.g. duck has a round beak, duck and goose both have wings). The book provides a simple way to teach adjectives, and is a great introduction to Easter vocabulary related to eggs and the Easter Bunny himself.

Lotsa Matzah - “Why is matzah plain and flat? For centuries its been like that.” This board book is great for toddlers and provides a rhyming introduction to Passover’s traditional food, Moses, and the hunt for the afikomen. An excellent opportunity to introduce new vocabulary in preparation for your seder this year.

2-5 years

Happy Easter, Little Critter - Mercer Mayer is one of those forever authors, who consistently delivers a great read, with abundant vocabulary and repetition. This one doesn’t fall short. My shelves are stocked with Little Critter books for the “pre-” preschooler.

Mercer Mayer also has great wordless picture books for your 5+ kiddo to practice story telling and narrative skills. Check out ones like Frog Goes to Dinneror A Boy, a Dog, and a Frog.

The Matzah That Papa Brought Home - This read is a “cumulative tale,” where each page gets longer and longer toexplain the feast of Passover. I love the variety of verbs and abstract adjectives that Ned Bittinger uses, great new word exposure for your little one.

Remember that pairing book reading tips with the five best methods for word learning will catapult your child’s language and vocabulary development.

What’s your little one’s favorite Easter or Passover book? We would love to hear from you!

What’s the Point of Pointing?

Posted on March 12, 2013August 11, 2015 by speechies

Pointing is one of the most important pre-verbal gestures and a crucial communication milestone that emerges within that first year of life.

Studies show that a child’s use of gesture and pointing at 14 months is the best predictor of later vocabulary size.

That’s right... a larger vocabulary for children who use pointing to communicate.

How do you get your child to point? Model the behavior! Point to pictures in books, specific parts on toys (for example, the wheel of a car), or use bubbles during play or bath-time.

It is a human specific gesture (not even a chimpanzee, our animal counterpart,can point!), which allows sharing of information about a visual item with another person. It sets up a three-way relationship between a subject who points, a partner and an object. And that’s communication!

There are two types of pointing: Protoimperative pointing represents desire for an object (for example, pointing to a cookie as a request), and Protodeclarative pointing indicates the desire to share an experience with another person (for example, a child pointing to a dog in the park to direct a parent). Both show a form of communicative intent that requires an exchange between two people. How advanced for your little one?!

This simple gesture is central to developing joint attention (or the ability to share experiences), one of the first goals of communication, and building cognition.

If by 12-15 months, your child has not begun pointing, consult with your pediatrician to address other issues related to language or communication delays.

Mr. Potato Head Makes His Comeback

Posted on March 5, 2013 by speechies

As a parent, you have plenty choices of toys for your child. But for enhancing language development, I am partial to the low tech, no batteries, easy to store kind of toys.

Mr. Potato Head has my heart.

He is one of the first toys that I introduce to any client under age 3. The opportunities for creative play and vocabulary building are unmatched to any other low-tech toy. Language is largely focused on body parts, but can carry-over into early imaginative play (just think of Mr. Potato Head in attendance at the next tea party).

As always during play, you will be providing your child with the ideal language model and using the five best methods of word learning. Here is how to use Mr. P to his fullest potential:

Body Part Identification: Place two objects in front of your child, and have him/her identify, e.g. Show me nose. As they get older, try it in a field of three or four items.

Following Directions: Try more directed play, and give your child one- and two-step directions, e.g. First put on his eyes, then put on his nose.

Making Requests: Always give choices, ask your child Do you want eyes or nose, and remember to elicit eye contact during communication. Model a verb+noun phrase for your child to request, e.g. Give-me nose.

Naming Body Parts: As your child becomes more familiar with Mr. P, and since you’ll be using plenty of repetition during previous play, chances are these words are budding on their expressive vocabulary. Cue your child to name each part with some clues, e.g. What goes in the middle? What does he need to smell (sniff sniff).

Expanding Phrases/Sentences: Combine these new nouns (eyes, nose, mouth, hands, shoes, hat, glasses) with verbs and concepts to best demonstrate how words are put together in language. For example:

Placing parts on/off - open bottom, push eyes, push mouth, pull nose, pull hand, hat on, shoes on
Parts by function - See eyes, smell nose, eat mouth, shake hands
Mr. Potato in play - Mr. P is just as good as any other doll for imaginative play and language building. Have him drive a toy car, prepare a snack in the kitchen, or as a guest at your tea party.

Eager to have him in your toy chest? Buy the original Mr. Potato Head on Amazon now!

Taking Book Reading to the Next Level

Posted on February 26, 2013August 11, 2015 by speechies

The benefits of reading to your child are no secret. Its great for parent-child bonding, building attention skills, fostering social-emotional development, and of course excellent for language development.

When they are young, we read aloud. Several of us have probably already adapted our own Do’s & Don’ts related to reading, whether it be a particular time of day, reading chair, or book selection method.

Book sharing is a great way to enhance speech and language development. Pictures within books foster the early knowledge that words have meaning. We can use picture books to build comprehension skills for objects, animals, and people. Have your find and point to those named objects on pages of a book.

But here is the real secret...

Book sharing is so much more meaningful, when it is dynamic. That means the same book can be read over and over again, but still be different. Here is what YOU can do to take reading with your baby or toddler to the next level.

1.) Use different voices and varying intonation when talking for or about certain characters. Dramatic pauses and exaggerations are good!

2.) Repeat, Repeat, Repeat. It is the #1 way children learn words. Repeat phrases and sentences within a page, and emphasize different parts.

3.) Ask questions... good questions. Not just “What will happen next? or What’s he doing?” Also ask critical thinking questions, like How or Why. If your child is too young to answer these, ask them anyway and give them the answer!

4.) Let your child turn the pages, and say “Turn the page” every time. Even if your kiddo is little, try hand-over-hand to get them to participate in book sharing more. It allows for good predictability and sustains attention longer.

5.) Reenact and talk about the story afterwards. Books that have repetition of action, like The Napping House and The Very Busy Spider, are great choices.

Check out The Speechies Recommended Book list for books that have great vocabulary for nouns and verbs. All recommended books make these five methods a breeze to take book reading to the next level.

The Dish on Articulation

Posted on February 19, 2013August 11, 2015 by speechies

Its almost impossible NOT to compare your child to others. Many moms ask something like, “There is a one-year old who speaks so clearly, I can understand everything, but no one knows what my 18-month old is saying.”

The fact is that articulation, or the ability to pronounce speech sounds, is a very complex motor skill.

It is much different than the muscles involved in walking and throwing a ball. Speech movements (using the lips, tongue, and teeth) are smaller and less visible to your kiddo, who is learning how to say it all.

Some of the early speech sounds your child makes are the ones you can see (sounds such as /b/, /m/ and /w/), but many speech sounds you cannot, because they are all INSIDE of your mouth, of course. Words they master are ones like mama, more, mine, and ball.

As your child passes the one-year mark, they should begin to use a larger variety of consonants during communication and play. The words they say may be difficult to understand, but know that this is normal.

By 24 months, you should be able to understand at least 50% of what your child is saying and by 36 months, about 75%.

Remember that when it comes to what is considered “normal,” there is a large grey area. So take this information lightly:

Sounds mastered by 2 years: p, b, m, w, t, d, n, h
Sounds mastered by 3 years: k, g
Sounds mastered by 4 years: f, v, y, l
Sounds mastered by 5-6 years: s, z, j, r, sh, ch, th

If your child does substitute sounds that make articulation less clear, just model the correct way. For example: Mama, div me dooce, you should say “Ok, Mama will give you juice.”

Remember that you are your child’s best language model. So keep just keep talking!

Sound Imitation and Early “Words”

Posted on February 12, 2013August 11, 2015 by speechies

As your baby starts babbling and jargoning, you might notice that it is much easier to imitate sounds, rather than words. Using more diverse sounds during play and communication can set a great stage for future word learning.

Babies love sounds because they are simpler for their little mouths to say the first 12 months of life. Most sounds have a repetitious consonant-vowel structure with elongated vowels, that makes imitation easy.

The sounds that you use during play should be made simultaneously with an action or movement. For example, don’t just push a car... push the car and say “vrooom.” Here are some other sounds to use when interacting with your little one everyday:

Feelings/Emotions

Happy- “mmmmm” (Lick lips, during mealtimes)
Yucky- “yuck, bleh” (Stick out tongue, wrinkle nose)
Stinky- “pee-you” (Wrinkle nose)
Trouble- “uh-oh” (Wide eyes)

Transportation

Train- “choo-choo” (Push train)
Car- “beep-beep” (Drive car)
Fire truck- “whoo-woo” (Drive truck)
Boat- “puh-puh-puh” (Wave boat)
Truck- “honk-honk” (Drive truck)

Household Objects/Toys

Clock- “tick-tock” (Rock head back and fourth)
Phone- “ring-ring” (Hold phone to ear)
Vacuum- “brrrrrrmm” (Pretend to push vacuum)
Popcorn- “pop-pop-pop” (Pop fingers up)
Bubbles- “pop-pop-pop” (Popping bubbles)

Dolls/Action Figures/Animals

Baby- “waaah” (Tap baby)
Sneezing- “achooo” (Place hand over face and mouth)
Hiding- “peek-a-boo” (Cover face)
Cow- “moo”
Dog- “ruff ruff”
Duck- “quack quack”

These early and simple sounds are the building blocks of verbal communication, words, and talking. As your child uses these sounds consistently to request or comment on activities, they are learning that sounds/words have meaning and intent.

Providing more opportunities for listening and learning, will certainly catapult your little one’s language skills.

Splish Splash, Learning Words in the Bath

Posted on February 6, 2013August 11, 2015 by speechies

The best opportunities for language learning and enhancement are through daily routines, like getting dressed and mealtime. Bath time can be a fun way to teach new vocabulary words, like nouns, verbs, and new phrases. You'll have to tailor some of the words and phrases depending on your child's age. Or you can work on identifying/finding items in the bath. For example: Find your ears, Find a bubble, Find your ducky!

Use these words in combination with short repetitious phrases. For example: wash hair, scrub feet, blow bubbles, pour water, pop bubble

Nouns Verbs Body Parts Concepts
water wash hair/head in/on
soap pour eyes under
bubbles splash nose up/down
shampoo pop mouth wet/dry
towel blow ears clean/dirty
tub/bath dry belly full/empty
Any Bath Toys! scrub feet all-gone/all-done

Bath time is a great time to teach body parts and ask your child to identify those parts on himself followed by a playful scrub.

Toys that can also help with word learning include bubbles, balls, animals, boats/trucks. You can always incorporate a fine motor or gross motor activity during bath time too! Here are a few suggested toys to facilitate play and new word learning at bath time:

What are your kiddo's favorite toys? Check out more Speechies recommended books & toys here

Long-Term Pacifier Use, and your baby’s teeth

Posted on January 29, 2013August 11, 2015 by speechies

How long is too long to use a pacifier? And should you be worried if your child sucks their thumb? Sucking is one of the earliest natural reflexes and is normal for infants. Babies frequently place their fingers and toys in their mouths for oral exploration.

Typically, children resort to this infantile reflex of sucking for soothing. Many children use a pacifier or place fingers in their mouths for increased sense of security. Unfamiliar situations such as meeting new people, being separated from parents, or experiencing a new environment may prompt a child’s need for self-assurance.

The American Dental Association (ADA) reported that prolonged thumb sucking or use of pacifier may cause problems with proper growth of mouth and palate and the alignment of teeth. Studies show that “children who sucked on pacifiers or thumbs were twice as likely to have misalignment as those who did not, and they were four times as likely to have an open bite." This was also more prevalent in children still exhibiting these behaviors after the age of two.

If thumb sucking persists after 5 years, it can affect a child’s speech as their permanent teeth emerge. It can alter the articulation of sounds such as /s/, /z/, /t/, /d/, and /l/.

Start thinking about “weaning your child” from the pacifier as soon as possible. By 10-12 months of age, your baby is learning to speak and imitate sounds, words, and the language you use. Speaking through a pacifier may alter the movements of those speech muscles, such as the lips and tongue, and may have an affect their articulation in the future.

Some considerations:

Praise and reward your child when they don’t use a pacifier or suck their thumb. Verbal reinforcement or star charts can be a great way to encourage the behavior of not using a pacifier
If it’s habit when he/she is bored, keep their hands busy to distract them with other objects
If it’s related to anxiety, focus on making your child feel secure and comfortable with hand holding or hugs.